Pre-Engagement Program
GIFT
The better you prepare now, the more you'll enjoy the engagement and focus on the sacrament.
A 5-session facilitated couples program for those discerning engagement or seeking clarity in long-term relationships.
Start your journeyThe Program
What is GIFT?
GIFT is a pre-engagement coaching program for Catholic couples who are approaching the question of engagement. Guided by Mike and Katie Palitto, you'll work through the FOCCUS Inventory together — naming your strengths, surfacing growth areas, and making your final discernment with clarity and confidence. This is not marriage prep — it's the step before, so you can enjoy the engagement and focus on the sacrament.
Facilitated
In-person sessions with an experienced married couple who offer feedback, affirm strengths, and help you navigate challenges.
FOCCUS-Based
The FOCCUS Inventory provides an objective foundation — identifying areas of agreement and topics that need deeper conversation.
Sacramental
Grounded in Catholic anthropology and Theology of the Body. This isn't couples therapy — it's formation for the vocation of marriage.
The Foundation
What is FOCCUS?
FOCCUS (Facilitating Open Couple Communication, Understanding & Study) is a research-based pre-marriage inventory used in Catholic dioceses worldwide. Each partner completes the inventory independently and it is electronically scored, highlighting areas of agreement and topics that need deeper conversation.
Within GIFT, your FOCCUS results become the roadmap for your sessions. Instead of guessing what to talk about, you walk into each conversation with clarity about what matters most for your relationship.
What We Cover
Compatibility areas
Friends, Interests & Personal Issues
How do your social worlds, personal interests, and individual challenges intersect? Understanding compatibility here sets the foundation for everything else.
Financial Values
Money is one of the top sources of conflict in marriage. GIFT surfaces your assumptions about spending, saving, generosity, and financial priorities before they become surprises.
Communication & Problem Solving
How do you talk about hard things? How do you repair after conflict? These skills determine whether challenges strengthen or erode your relationship.
Family
Family-of-origin dynamics, expectations about children, and the relationship between your two families. These conversations are easier to have now than after the wedding.
Spirituality & Values
Shared prayer life, Mass attendance, openness to God's plan, and the values that will guide your marriage. Alignment here is the bedrock of a sacramental relationship.
Sexuality
A frank, dignified conversation grounded in Theology of the Body — expectations, past wounds, and building a sacramental understanding of marital intimacy.
Who is GIFT for?
Couples discerning engagement
You've been dating intentionally and the question of engagement is on the table. GIFT helps you make that final discernment with confidence — so when the ring comes, you both know exactly why you're saying yes.
Long-term couples needing clarity
You've been together a while but something is keeping you from moving forward. Maybe it's unresolved issues, fear, or simply not knowing how to have the hard conversations. GIFT creates the structure and safety to find your answer.
The Process
How GIFT works
Introduction Call
We start with a short 15-minute FaceTime to explain everything, answer your questions, and make sure GIFT is the right fit for where you are as a couple.
Take the FOCCUS Inventory
After payment, each partner separately completes the FOCCUS inventory of questions. It is electronically scored, giving us an objective picture of your relationship.
Four Facilitated Sessions
The couple meets with Mike and Katie over the course of four 1-hour sessions to go over the results. While the emphasis is on facilitating conversation between you, there is also coaching and practical life experience from the facilitators.
Continued Conversation
Additional conversation outside of sessions is encouraged. The insights from GIFT are meant to be lived, not just discussed. This is the beginning, not the end.
* GIFT is pre-engagement coaching, not marriage prep. It is designed to help you make your discernment with confidence before entering formal marriage preparation with your parish.
Interested in GIFT?
Tell us about your situation. We'll connect you with a facilitator couple and walk you through next steps.